Satirical roguery from Jesus' General, describing the next target in Bush's War on Terra:

One hundred and fifty years of shame The case for war against Pender Island, British Columbia (Part 1)

On June 15, 1859, those who hate America because we're free sent a pig into Lyman Cutler's garden on San Juan Island in Oregon Territory. That pig was a message. A message of disrespect for all we stand for. Lyman Cutler answered that message in the only way a true American can. He shot the pig. Thus began what became to be know as the Pig War.

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The British terrorists moved across the Haro Strait to Pender Island. Their progeny live their today, smugly taunting America with their pigs and gardens. We may have the land, but the Pender Islanders have our stolen honor and they mean to keep it. That's why they have acquired weapons of mass destruction and have opened terrorist training camps. More on that in future installments.

Scroll up for vital information on the Pender Islanders' diabolical clams.