Today Canada voted! Again! And HogBlog is here once again to tell you what to think.
Not much, to tell the truth.
You can see fun little updating scorecards here and here and here and probably lots of other places too, if you like to keep track of these things. The writing's on the wall, and the Conservatives under Stephen Harper are going to get a minority government. Neither the Conservative win nor the Liberal loss are shaping up to be all that overwhelming. As far as vote shares and numbers of seats in Parliament go, to a first approximation they've just traded places.
It's been a boring election. Like, really boring. Even I can't get too excited about it. I was actually hoping the Liberals would lose more seats. Because, and let's be perfectly honest here, they were sort of lame. They made Paul Martin their leader, for god's sake. That's lamer than a one-legged duck made of cheese, which is very lame indeed, let me tell you. Paul Martin was disturbingly reminiscent of a US Democrat. (Not one of your Howard Deans, either.) Though he looked more like William Shatner. Only without Shatner's charisma and sincerity. If only he'd grabbed the microphone and shouted 'KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!', maybe he could've made it. But no. Hopefully, a Conservative victory means he'll quit, and maybe next time the Liberals can pick a leader who looks a little more like Leonard Nimoy.
The New Democratic Party, my personal favourite, has made gains. Their leader, Jack Layton, looks like Jack Nance, best known as Pete Martell on Twin Peaks. (There is no evidence yet that, after defeating his Liberal challenger, Layton phoned up Paul Martin to say 'She's dead. Wrapped in plastic.') They're the only vaguely interesting party up there. I was hoping Svend Robinson, their openly gay ex-MP who left Parliament after admitting to stealing a ring from an auction (which he blamed on a bipolar disorder), would win a seat again, but it looks like it wasn't meant to be. Winnipeg's elected a couple of NDPers. It's not such a bad place, Winnipeg. Some of the men are hot.
The Conservative leader, Stephen Harper, doesn't really look like anyone, so far as I can tell. Except for maybe some kind of oily golem-like creature made out of dough. It's not like he'll actually have the votes to do anything significant, though, so...who cares?
ADDENDUM (28/01/06): For real talk about real things and real people who aren't William Shatner, check out the comments to this post on Making Light.
Posted by aloysius at January 23, 2006 09:39 PM |